‘For me, the war means...’

a turning point in my life.

When did the war in Donbass begin for you?

Probably, the start was the first morning and evening roars of artillery guns from Stanytsia Luhanska. It was July 2014. We left on 21 June when there were still trains from Luhansk; so, we have not experienced coming under fire or more stressful situations. No one has been killed or injured from my relatives, thank God...

What did you talk about with your family and neighbours during active hostilities?

When hostilities were just beginning, we talked about how to get prepared for what was to come. We prepared our house, cleaned our cellar, had it ready. We prepared places to take cover from shelling, a kind of bomb shelter. We saved some money and did some things. Apart from mass media, which we distrusted, we listened to what eyewitnesses were saying, people who were leaving and hardly escaped shelling, those who saw some explosions. 

What do you remember the most from the experience you went through during the war?

The time when we were leaving Luhansk where the old bridge to Stanytsia was still intact and cars were crossing over it, some convoy... check-ups on the way...It was an exodus: a lot of people fleeing.

When we came back in September, the city had neither water nor electricity. The sun was down, and you could see people walking with their mobile phones like fireflies. On the outskirts of the city where I used to live there was some elevated area on the way to Stanytsia Luhanska, near the fire station and the market... about one hundred per one hundred metres where mobile connection was better. So, people went there to get connected to call their close ones to say that they were alive and well.

When we reached my mother’s place, we saw a passenger car and my mother and some other people outdoors: someone had a battery, and they put a laptop on and were watching a movie. It was surreal: people sitting in complete darkness.

How did you relocate because of the war?

At first, we took some things, suitcases and left by the train. Our son lived in Kyiv. He had an apartment where we could stay, which we did. Then we made some reservation, my wife insisted, to go to a health resort in Truskavets, and we went there. From there, I called home and listened to my friends’ stories what was going on in Luhansk... all that shelling.

Do you plan to come back home when the war is over?

Not, we don’t, so far.

How has the war changed your life?

Before, you used to plan something; you were sure that you could plan, not anymore.

Tell us please how the war affected your everyday life

It is not possible to travel freely. I used to take the train and get to Kyiv or to Luhansk. I could visit my mother. 

Do you feel safe now?

Of course not, a war could start; not the one that was but of a bigger scale. Rationally it should not but before, we also used to think that such things would never happen to us.

What do you drеam about?

I dream about regular life I used to have before the war. To be able to plan. To have a secure job. To have confidence.

What is happiness for you?

Confidence about the future. Possibility to plan. We used to have a summer cottage (dacha), a flat; it could be our property left for children, but we don’t have it now.

Has your perception of life changed because of the war?

Now you understand that the confidence we used to have was partially an illusion. Today, you try to persuade yourself, day after day, that everything is ok.

When we came to Kyiv, we had a kind of – I do not know how to name it – the ‘Afghan syndrome’... When you are passing by and people are eating ice-cream, you want to scream: ‘People, the war is going on!’

In spring, it is especially hard. We used to have our cottage house (dacha), it was our paradise on earth for my wife and me. Now, when I see people with some young plants or seedlings to plant, it is hard. I had that feeling for some time... for about three or four years.