War is pain. It is when you constantly fear for your family. It is uncertainty and instability. It is a great misfortune to constantly hear military cannonade and be afraid to hear a familiar name among the victims.
How can you convey the feeling when you realize that you are only 150 meters away from death?
This is a misunderstanding of who to ask for help in case of something, because at the beginning of hostilities, it was impossible to wait for an ambulance and even call.
It was the end of June 2014. We gathered at the dinner table.
And suddenly the terrible and oppressive hum of a military plane. It was getting closer by the second. The bomber was flying very low, and when it hovered over our house, life seemed to stop for a moment.
This awful sound made the windows rattle and the chairs jump in the house. A little later we learned that he was shot down near Debaltseve.
Furthermore.. how can you convey the feeling when you realize that you are only 150 meters away from death? A shell exploded near the house in the courtyard of a boarding school. No one was wounded by a miracle.
The hardest thing is to lose those you love. In June 2014, my husband's father died. In 2016, my father died. They both had heart attacks. They could not stand it, they could not accept these events and the pain that the war brought.
We were forced to leave our home and our usual way of life because of the war. We are deprived of the opportunity to be near our mothers who stayed there. They are elderly people, and they may need help at any moment. Who will come to the rescue?
We lost our security – that's the first thing. Then we faced financial difficulties. Salaries were not paid on time. The factory where my husband worked was taken over by the military. We have a daughter growing up. She is 14 years old. We did not understand what the future holds in the place where they fire all the time. So we were forced to leave.
Now we live in a rented apartment. We do not feel like home and wait for some unforeseen difficulties to occur. The inability to visit your family when you want to is hard psychologically.
What do people who constantly live in a war zone think and say? Normal, adequate people really want the war to end. They understand that only political businessmen are interested in its continuation and do not understand why they suffer in this situation. Civilians need help, especially psychological help.
Those who required it the most received it from the Rinat Akhmetov Foundation.
I saw trucks from the Charitable Foundaton and the Red Cross vehicles. I don't know anyone or any other organisation that provides such assistance.
The most terrible thing at war is death and being left alone without hope to wait for help.
Happiness is when you can return to your cosy, peaceful home. Happiness is when you are with your family and everyone is healthy and alive. I dream that the war will end and everyone will return home unharmed.
Now I know that when the choice is to live in my home or leave with my family alive, I will choose the latter. I'm sure my home is where my family is, where I am, although I miss my home walls very much. We are the only support for ourselves.