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Stories that you confided to us

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Viktoriia Milakova

"My children know what it's like to survive"

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We couldn't have children, so… At one point, we made a decision that we wanted to live for someone to have the meaning of life. So we decided to adopt a child. We really wanted a son. We adopted a boy. He was a year and four months old.

My children know what it's like to survive

And then we thought that the child would grown better if he had a sister or brother. And two years later we decided to take the girl. We were offered to see two twins who were in the shelter. We had a shelter here in Avdiivka before the war. When we saw them, the girls liked us immediately. I could tell. They came to us and hugged us. So we took them with us. And then we adopted a younger girl, who was a year and eight years old.

My children know what it's like to survive

How can you live without children? This is the meaning of life. They are  love and tenderness. We need to teach them how to be good people. We would like them to be kind, loving, caring, responsible, hard-working. So that they can help others, despite the age.

My children know what it's like to survive

Terrible attacks were happening here for days. They bombed this area from morning to night. Everything was shaking. Children are sitting in the hallway. When a shell fell nearby, a few meters from the house, that is, there was a gap, children, of course, it was terrible… There was a terrible scream, and I couldn't stand on my feet. I rushed out, shaking. This is the only time when we... I was terribly scared.

When a shell fell a little further in the field, we got scared, but not so much. No one panicked. They could distract each other. We could tell each other things. We played different word games. So we tried to talk all the time. When we had to wait it out in the corridor, we spoke about different things. We talked and tried to ignore what was happening.

Since we were together all the time, we were distracted by telling some stories. Even when it was very loud and deafening and when the house was shaking. But the children understood that we were near – and they had nothing to fear.

War means fear, death, and horror. I feel so afraid for the children. I just wish they safe and sound. I wish they would forget what was happening here. I wasn't thinking about myself. I tried to be ready all the time, so that I would be there to cover them with my body. We have always been close. We were  inseparable.

I will probably never forgot about this. It's impossible to forget everything we've been through. We had no light and water. We were worried when my husband  went to work. He worked shifts at the factory. And if he left, we couldn't call him, because the lines were cut off. God forbid, he was delayed. We sat with the children and waited, because it was impossible to go out on the street because of the shelling, which was terrible. Attack could last for days.

When husband came in the evening, he went to the well. It is withing a 10-minute walk away. He brought water so that we could wash, cook food, etc.

The youngest daughter had to leave school for a while. The children could not finish kindergarten education. They lagged behind. The twins had to play truant. They missed Year 3. This is a big loss for children, because it is very difficult to catch up. The war influenced us both morally and physiologically.

My children know what it's like to survive

All this horror lasted for a year and a half. We had to pull through. We had to adjust to a new daily routine. The children know what it is like when you have to be careful and tighten the belt. We had to use water very efficiently. We could not use it unless there was a purpose for that. Well, you never know what might happen to you.

When quoting a story, a reference to the source – the Museum of Civilian Voices of the Rinat Akhmetov Foundation – is mandatory, as follows:

The Museum of Civilian Voices of the Rinat Akhmetov Foundation https://civilvoicesmuseum.org/

Rinat Akhmetov Foundation Civilian Voices Museum
Avdiivka 2014 2015 2016 Video Civilian's stories children shelling safety and life support education water families with two or more children
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