The woman was riding a bicycle. She believed that she would live on. Unfortunately, the worst thing happened. A photo from the scene of the tragedy, which shows a hand with a manicure, went viral around the world. The daughter of the victim shares her terrible memories.
The last time I saw her was on 20 February. Well, it was on the 24th, on 24 February. War is war, but she had to go to her work. It just so happened that on 24 February she was called to her work and so she went to her workplace. She stayed at Epicentre store for a week. That is, she first went to her first work shift and then she was left for the second shift, as it was very difficult for another employee to get to work. It sounds very strange and it sounded very strange to me too: what second shift could there be if there is a war?
But she said that she was told at work that they would work two shifts each. And after her second shift, she could no longer get out of there, could not leave because Epicentre shopping mall was and is not far from Kyiv. At that time, a larger-scale fighting began near Kyiv, so they stayed at Epicentre for seven days, that is for a week. Our village is not far from Kyiv. You all know where Bucha is, and we are located near Bucha. Explosions were heard not far from us. Then she left Epicentre store and went in the direction of our house because she wanted to stay safe there.
She was afraid to go to Kyiv because she did not know what exactly was happening in the city. When she headed off in the direction of our house, shooting started right near Epicentre, very close. She got scared and went towards our house.
And due to the fact that at that time the media did not cover the whole situation in Kyiv region, unfortunately she did not know what was happening, and that the worst was happening not in Kyiv, but in our area. Many people ask now how she could not know it, how she could go and don’t… well, without checking any information?
I think that such people… well, they either left earlier, before the war, or were not amidst military hostilities. So they do not really understand the whole situation and that very fear and shock that grips a person who tries to find rescue by any means. There is no such person or information source that would be reporting to you every minute, informing how the situation changes and whether you can go there or not. That is, she did not know it, and unfortunately at that time people in our village, Mykhailivka-Rubezhivka, did not have a telephone signal, so it was not possible to let her know. I mean, the telephone signal was jammed then. On 5 March, when she was killed, she called me. She gave me a call when she was in Irpin town.
Irpin is a town near Bucha. She phoned from Irpin and told me that she was on the way to our house. Some 10-15 minutes before her call, I heard that it was the first day of the evacuation in Irpin.
I told her, “You are now going to… do not go to our house because, I don’t know the details, but I know that it is not safe there”. Well, I was told that people were tortured and killed there, but you know, I was on the other side.
People who called from the village could not describe everything in detail in five minutes to get full understanding. So I told her that I knew it for sure that she should not go there. All I knew was that she needed to get ready and run for the evacuation. Analysing that situation now, why she did not go for the evacuation, it was probably because there was no train. There were no people waiting for the train, and she was out in the open, where the airplanes were flying, where bombs were flying. She would have just waited in vain and put herself in even greater danger. Do you see what I mean? And the evacuation would be in half an hour, in 40 minutes or so. Well, you understand that it was not done on any sort of schedule or timetable.
She told me that she loves me and also told me that it was difficult to work the pedals, since she was on a bike. She hung up and did not pick up the phone anymore. The next day, realizing that she was not picking up the phone, I decided that I should search for her.
First, I tried to call my neighbours, call my father, who was staying in the village, but because of the poor connection, I only got through to them the next morning. And when they said that my mother was not there, that she had not come, I immediately thought that maybe she was injured; maybe she lost her phone somewhere; maybe she saw from afar that there were tanks or someone and she hid, or, if so, maybe she even went in the other direction somehow.
I started the search. My sister and I started posting on the Internet that I was looking for my mother. Maybe someone [saw her] during the evacuation or someone, who has a telephone or Internet connection, saw her when leaving together with their relatives. And since she had a jacket with the Epicentre logo (this is quite an important detail for identification), the very next day, on 6 March, a man wrote me and said that my mother was shot dead.
Surely, we then checked the details, as like every person, for every person’s state of mind, you start to ask questions... If he does not describe it in more detail, then it means that he was wrong, and then it means that it did not happen. So my sister and I started looking for her again because he did not show [any evidence].
Yes, he said she was shot down, but he did not show me a video or photo to prove it. The only thing he said was that there was no access to that place for the Ukrainian military, for our [forces]. And I thought that if they did not have access to the place, they could not really see if she was wounded or not. Maybe the people who were there would be able to pick her up and somehow take her to the hospital or treat her themselves.
I resumed my search on the Internet. I also called hospitals, called some official institutions/authorities that I could get to at the time. Unfortunately, there were no results, but a lot of people got involved. I mean, everyone already knew that I was looking for my mother, that we were looking for my mother.
And on 1 April, which was her birthday, which was supposed to be her birthday, I made a wish – that we could find her. Surely, I made a wish that we would find her alive, but it so happened that already in the evening of 1 April I got a video.
The video was shot by the military for identification purposes. It showed my mother lying next to the bicycle, and the first thing I did... I saw that it was my mother. I saw that she was lying, and I clearly understood that she was already dead, and had been dead for a long time. But I called a man who gave her the bike and asked, I asked one single question, “Tell me, please. I’ll send you a video now. Can you say if the bike is yours?” It’s so hard, because if he had said it wasn’t his, I’d still be looking for her, I think.
Well, I understand, my mind understands, but my soul does not want to understand it. And he said, “Yes, this is my bicycle. Please forgive me for giving her the bike.”
But of course, these words did not really play any role. After 1 April, after we got that video, when we knew that my mum was dead, we had to get the body. And it so happened that... You know, it was like in the pre-war time, when you had to run from one institution to another institution in order to get something.
During the war, it was even more difficult, because when I called the Bucha town helpline, saying that I knew the address where my mum’s body was and asking whether it was possible to pick it up, I was told, “What village are you from?” Well, I named the village, Mykhailivka-Rubezhivka, and they answered, the volunteer on the other end of the line answered, “Well, but you belong to the Irpin community.” I said, “Yes, but my mother, whom I want to take and bury, lies in Bucha.” She said, “If it’s more convenient for you, you can fill out the Google form and wait.” Wait for the military to reach that place, and then hand her over to the Irpin community. And then I would still need to contact the Irpin community and pick her up from there. Naturally, I got angry.
I was quite clear, and maybe it was incorrect, but I was a little bit rude to her. Well, while looking for my mother for more than 20 days, I filled out Google forms so many times; I called all the telephone numbers so many times! And the most painful thing is that I found her due to our own efforts, not a single Google form and not a single call that was made to find her through the official authorities ever helped.
And now, when I knew that her body was found, I knew where to pick it, and my father, who was there, could come from the village, it would take five minutes, and would pick her up, they told me to “fill out a Google form.”
Well, it’s like, you know, I could bury her on 1 April, on 6 April, and then [postponed] again, because I had to wait for this Google form. And when we finally called Irpin, we were told in Irpin that they were demining [the area], and that they would leave on Monday.
It was on Saturday. That they would leave on Monday, and they would call us back, they would take it, or better we call them. We waited for Monday. On Monday, nobody was picking up the phone. They sent us an SMS: “Call only on Tuesday.” It so happened that no one picked up the phone on Tuesday, but our father went to that place himself in the morning. That is, regardless of whether it was mined or not, he understood that nothing would happen that way. When he learned about my mum on 6 April (we told him), on 7 April he already drove there on his own to see what was with my mum and whether it was possible to help or take her away. And he came under fire too, but thank God, he managed to get out, and now he went there again, he went to her again.
He called me and said, “But the body is not there, it was taken earlier.”
On 13 April, it was 40 days since my mum died. We buried her on 11 April at our place, near our house. I mean, we have a cemetery near our house. Understanding how difficult it is for me at the age of 26 to get through this, how difficult it is to understand… To be honest, I still cannot understand what happened and how to continue living. I just lie down and think that I don’t want to see tomorrow, that the war no longer exists for me. Whatever happens around me, it does not matter for me at all. That is, I am gone together with her.
And if it’s so hard for me, what about the children who stayed there, who not only know that they no longer have parents – their mum or dad, or both parents, but who saw it all.
They saw with their own eyes that some men came and killed their parents, and not just killed, but many of the victims were tortured. They saw that some men came and killed them just for nothing. Their parents who were their only protection in the whole world. Now they are simply left without this protection, and the state could not protect them in this either, because they killed them; came to their house and killed them. Then I think that with the help of this foundation I...
I hope that I will become this new support for them, as my mother was for me, as their parents were for them... That is, so that a child could develop this psychological backbone, so that he or she... I will not say that it will happen in a year. I won’t even say that it will be in two years. That the child will be able to come to his or her senses, because many children are crippled. They have stopped talking; they have even stopped communicating with their relatives or with their sisters. This is necessary. It is a very challenging and long-term work, but I hope that after all, through my story, I will be able to give them exactly what they need.
Previously, I worked as a psychologist. I worked with children, and I also dealt with children who have psychological and physiological disabilities. My mum always put up with hours of my talking about these families. About these children, about their difficult fate, and about what I was doing and what I wanted to do to make it a little easier for them.
She listened to all this and at the end always said, “Olia, working with children is for you. You give them more than you can give yourself.
And you are worth more than you can imagine. And if someone tells you that you cannot do something, or someone tells you that you, well, that it is impossible, you should know that the only thing that is impossible in your life is death. Get up” – she always said – “Why are you lying? Get up and do it, and then the result will follow. The result will not happen immediately.” That is why I am working 24/7 now, in order to get a result. But as I already said, unfortunately, the result will not be in a year or two.
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