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"Our daughter gave birth to our granddaughter in Bucha without electricity, water, and without any birth attendant at delivery"
A resident of Kyiv Kateryna Tymchenko is the mother of nine children. When explosions began to be heard outside the window and military airplanes flew over the houses, while the air raid siren did not stop, the woman was stricken by panic. When the full-scale war began, the youngest children in the Tymchenko family – their charming twins – were only seven months old.
Kateryna had only one task – to ensure safety for all her children. The family left the country but her oldest children remained in Bucha town. Kateryna’s daughter was staying under the occupation being at the 39th week of pregnancy. A therapist and a designer were her birth attendants at delivery in the basement, without heat, water and electricity...
My name is Kateryna Tymchenko. I am a mother of nine children, and a resident of Kyiv. On 24 February, when the war began, my husband and I did not believe it until the last, even when the first explosion thundered. My husband said that I just thought it all out. This was hard. It was hard to realize that this was even possible. In a couple of hours, it was time for us to wake up the kids to get them ready for school and kindergarten.
I started waking them up and crying that the war began, “You need to get dressed, we need to run away somewhere.”
My husband was trying to persuade me, while remaining quite composed, that nothing terrible would happen, nothing [terrible] was happening. “It is somewhere out there but our [armed forces] will cope with it, and there’s no reason for panicking.” That is, he was sort of trying to calm me down that way – and I did start to calm down. But then some explosion happened again and some new information appeared. The wave [of panic] hit me again.
My children said that I was mad because when the air strike sirens wailed, I had fits of hysterics.
I cried a lot. I could not run to the shelter, which we ourselves arranged in our house together with our neighbours, as they were not allowed into the neighbouring house because there were too many tenants there. I could not go down to this basement – I had two seven-month-old twins in my arms.
When we heard that everyone was leaving Kyiv and going somewhere, we did not know what to do. Well, as I said, my husband was trying to reassure me, with such confidence, such inner calmness, that there was no need to go anywhere and that everything was fine. However, on the evening of 25 February, when I told the children not to take off their shoes and their clothes but only take off their jackets/overcoats, yet still keep them at hand, and if something happens, we would run straight to the stairwell, to the entrance hallway.
Another siren wailed and I started helping the youngest kids to get ready. I shouted to the elder ones, “Put on your jackets and hats and move to the entrance hallway quickly!” I looked at our Daniel, who is five years old, and he was in his underpants and a T-shirt.
That is, he undressed after he came. Then I began to shake my husband, throw myself into his chest, sob and scream, saying, “If you don’t take us out, I’ll just go crazy.” Because I had to grab our little kids and take them out somewhere. The rest of the children obeyed. They cried but ran after me. While this one was standing in his underpants and I still had to help him dress himself up. My husband said, “Well, if something happens, let’s leave tomorrow morning then.” I asked, “Where to?” And he said, “Somewhere to the west.” That’s it. Those were his words. We packed up and got ready on the morning of 26 February, that is, on the third night since the outbreak of the war.
We were fleeing; we were running away under Grad MLRS shellfire, without taking with us anything that we had to take in fact.
If you are leaving for some long time, well, not for two or three days, let’s say... I did not take anything except diapers and a couple of baby food packs. I didn’t take any books, any pens, any shoes, well, just nothing for the kids. Well, that’s how we got out. We were leaving Kyiv that was empty. This was a ghastly sight, as if from some movie, some other reality. When we were leaving, we had 30 litres of diesel fuel in the fuel tank and 2,200 hryvnias (UAH) in our pockets. We had nothing else. We did not know how we were going to get somewhere.
I just prayed, I prayed a lot. I screamed loudly in the car. The children got used to keeping silent, they only repeated at the end, “amen”.
The hardest thing that made me sick at heart was to know that enemies were around; the “orcs” [derogatory name for russian troops] were around us at that time. Our older children were in Bucha, in Lisna Bucha district – our son, our daughter, our son-in-law and a friend of their family. Our daughter was at the 39th week of pregnancy, while staying in the basement. They did not have... they were running out of food. They had almost nothing by that time. It was difficult, that was my inner pain...
I said, “Well, if I go there, am I going to shout there? I am a mother with many kids. I have to save my daughter who is expecting.” Well, they might shoot me and that’s all. And who needs these sacrifices? Who needs this heroism and what for? Our daughter said, “You’d better go there, to the west. I would feel calmer knowing that you took out and saved our brothers and sisters.” When we came to Zakarpattia, we were well received by local people and provided with an accommodation to live in. We could live there for free. We were told that there was an organization that provided free meals for children, for children from internally displaced families that were forced to leave their homes, like us. We went there and indeed, they gave some food to the children. Some of it was left over for us. At lunchtime, another organization fed us and that was for free too. They helped us with the most essential goods, an aid from Romania. Those were some baby formulas, diapers, and baby clothes, as I did not take anything with me, although I had enough of everything back in Kyiv. I had everything except food. I left everything there.
Then the owner of that organization said, “Why don’t you go abroad? Everyone comes here and then leaves. After all, you have seven minor children. You can go [abroad]. At least you will be on state support there. They will help you there, so do not worry about the money.” I called my eldest daughter, as they were still reachable by phone then. She said, “Mum, if there is an opportunity, go for it.”
And I said, “But how can we leave? While you are here.” She answered, “You won’t help us anyway. Go there. It will be easier for us, as we will be less stressed and worried then.”
So we decided to go to an unknown place without money, and without having any acquaintances there. We crossed the border very quickly. “Vylok” border crossing point on the border with Hungary. We crossed the border and ended up in Hungary very quickly. We spent our first night in Hungary on some parking lot because it was difficult to go somewhere further. My husband nearly fell asleep at the steering wheel. In the afternoon, we were already in Slovakia where my cousin met and accommodated us. There was a friend of mine there too. We have been friends with them for eight years, with this family. He is German and she is from Moscow, but she has been living in Germany for 22 years, and she gave birth to two children here. We had some kind of a barrier inside us, as the person who wanted to receive us was from Russia. However, her words…, the way she persuaded us to come, and assured us that everything would be fine, that they would be able to help us; this a little bit shook our internal struggle – to go or not to go. I would say that it helped us make a decision. We decided to give it a try.
We came here to Germany. The first four weeks we lived at the place belonging to a cousin of that girl’s husband. I mean that girl from Russia. We lived on a farm. The rooms there had very thin walls and were meant purely for workers who come to perform some seasonal work at this agricultural farm. But you know, thanks to them we had a roof over our heads during this period.
Calmness, silence and a very strong support from the Germans. They started to come – they were strangers who found out that a Ukrainian family came there.
We were the first family to come to Lichtenau town, to this area... the district of Baden-Baden. People kept coming to us. They brought us some money, some clothes, some tasty food, and some sweets for the children. They brought us all body care products too. And what was striking for us, they brought us some money too. Someone brought us 10 euros and others gave us 100 euros. He put it into his shirt like this and they said, “We, Germans, are ready to give off our last shirts, only to make it easier for you.” They cried together with us because it was impossible to take it all without tears. Everyone was supportive, and that is how we lived for four weeks.
Then they phoned us and said, “We found a house for you.” A month later, we settled in a two-storey house with many rooms. All my children are now in a very comfortable condition, when we do not have to huddle in one room, as it was previously on that farm. When airplanes fly in the sky, they are peaceful, civilian planes. The kids started to attend the school. Germany helps us in various ways. For example, by providing us with a mobile phone service, and so we can call to Ukraine and keep in touch with our relatives and friends absolutely free of charge and without limitations. Germany helped us by giving us a new stroller, bicycles, scooters, and kickbikes. Twice a week, they give us the food we need, such as eggs, bread, and butter. Well, in fact, they supported and continue to support our Ukrainian citizens with their care.
On the evening of 7 March, my daughter started having contractions, and it was probably the most terrible time that my husband and I had during that entire period. Because she was at home, in their house located in Lisova Bucha, without electricity, gas, water, heating and without an obstetrician-gynaecologist (birth attendant) at hand.
Later, after our granddaughter Alisa was born, I learned that strong contractions began only at 4 o’clock in the morning. And only at 4 o’clock in the morning, they called a neighbour who turned out to be a therapist. She had never been a birth attendant in her life before, but now she had to do it. Iryna, the therapist, along with another girl, who was a homemaker, and the third one, who was a designer. Although I don’t even know what kind of designer she was. The three of them were attendants at birth and delivered a baby for three hours. At 7 o’clock, our Alisa was born. For the first time in their lives, they were present at birth as people who witnessed a new life to come. Our son-in-law Vova cut the umbilical cord. At 07:07, our eldest son called us and said, “Grandma and grandpa, we congratulate you, everything is fine.” If it can be called “fine” at all. Still we felt happy but also felt some inner pain knowing in what conditions they were. Thank God, on 10 March they were evacuated.
I knew there had to be an evacuation. There were a lot of people involved, who tried to help.
And, thank God, this time everything worked out well. They were evacuated, and they left in the direction of Zhytomyr region. At first, they lived at their friend’s place there. Then they moved to Rivne region and were staying there. Now, they have returned to Kyiv. We were strictly against them returning but they said that they could not bear it and wanted to go home. Because when they saw how Dmytro Komarov showed the whole world their house and our eldest son’s car, which was standing mined nearby (while we thought the car was already gone), then I also had a desire to come back and help them do something. However, we are very far from Ukraine. But our children said, “No, we will go anyway.” Now our granddaughter, our baby Alisa, is more than one month old. We still cannot give her a hug and kiss. I don’t see any sense in returning home now, although my soul and heart are torn apart, for sure, and I really want to be back.
I just understand, both my husband and I – we are on one page about this – it is too early to bring the children back. What was the point of leaving then? Only now, they do not flinch at the sound of a flying airplane any more.
Only now, they almost don’t say anything about those days that they lived through when we were leaving. Those damaged fuel stations along the way, when we were driving to Western Ukraine. Those sounds of air alarm sirens… I want our children to have good mental health, my husband and I do so. That is why we have been staying here so far. We are very grateful to this German land and these people. We believe in victory. We believe in the imminent victory on our land, our country’s victory. We are very grateful to everyone who stayed [in Ukraine] and has the opportunity to help every minute in order to bring our victory closer and closer. These are the military, civilians, volunteers, and everyone else.
When quoting a story, a reference to the source – the Museum of Civilian Voices of the Rinat Akhmetov Foundation – is mandatory, as follows:
The Museum of Civilian Voices of the Rinat Akhmetov Foundation https://civilvoicesmuseum.org/
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